Nathan W. Bingham
Connecting in a Hyper-Connected World

Division in the Church

Division in the Church
I recently heard the following joke:


A man was walking along San Francisco’s Golden Gate Bridge when he saw a woman about to jump off. He ran up to her, trying to dissuade her from committing suicide. He told her simply that God loved her. A tear came to her eye.
He then asked her, “Are you a Christian, a Jew, a Hindu, or what?”

“I’m a Christian,” she replied.

He said, “Me, too! Small world! Protestant or Catholic?”

“Protestant.”

“Me, too! What denomination?”

“Baptist.”

“Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?”

“Northern Baptist.”

He remarked, “Well, ME TOO! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?”

She answered, “Northern Conservative Baptist.”

He said, “Well, that’s amazing! Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist or Northern Conservative Reformed Baptist?”

“Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist.”

“Remarkable! Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes Region or Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Eastern Region?”

She told him, “Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes Region.”

“A miracle!” he cried. “Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?”

She said, “Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912.”

He then said, “Die, heretic!”, and pushed her over the rail.


When I first heard this joke I had a good laugh, but that laughter soon turned to grief.

I’m the first to say you gotta be able to laugh at yourself, but it’s just as important that we take the time to pause and reflect on the sad truth that underlies this joke.

Remember, we’re not playing a game of Angry Birds.

Original joke by Emo Philips.

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